Sydnee Washington in the Cash Cab

We hailed a yellow cab and turned it into a photo studio for ten blocks, much to the chagrin of our driver.

Sydnee Washington is the kind of comedian you see and can’t shake for weeks. The first time I saw her perform, I remember leaving and genuinely wondering how I’d built a personality at all without using hers as the blueprint.

Anytime I need a pick-me-up, I go straight to her Black Barbie Stories pinned on Instagram. They’re tales from her genuinely wild Manhattan bottle-girl days, told through hundreds of Black Barbie photos. Where she finds them, I cannot be sure, but thank God she does. Just go watch. I can’t do them justice here.

You’ve seen her on Abbott Elementary, Search Party, in the finale of Broad City, and through Comedy Central Up Next. She’s been nominated for a Primetime Emmy. She’s won a Writers Guild of America Award. And every week, she hosts the podcast Mess with her best friend Marie Faustin.

So we did what made sense. We hailed a yellow cab and turned it into a photo studio for ten blocks, much to the chagrin of our driver.

Best date spot in the city?

Domodomo in the west village. Delicious hand rolls, sexy ambiance, and they have a lot of dishes you can share (sharing is HOT!)

Last song that made you cry?

*Trigger warning* Olivia Dean “couple minutes” paired with a video of someone vlogging the last day with their dog’s life. Diabolical combo but yeah I couldn’t stop the water works for at least 20 mins.

Dream Role?

For so long I wanted to be on Euphoria as Rue’s long lost older cousin who is a reformed party girl. Show her you can get clean and still cause chaos. That’s literally my life right now. Sober for 8 ½ years and I’m still bad with money, constantly losing things, and break dancing at karaoke. You can still be a mess without drugs and alcohol.

Now this is just for shits & giggles: Maybe in the “Barbie” sequel and I would be Barbie’s best friend that never wants to meet up in real life but says funny monologues on FaceTime. A lot of close ups of my face just giving Barbie the best and worst advice.

Favorite place to perform?

I’m sorry I can’t pick just one: Comedy Cellar, Union Hall, Bell House.

Group chats?

I’m so bad at them. Too many messages overwhelm me. I’m a one-on-one type of gal. Currently I’m in 6 group chats and technically bombing in most of them.

Lesbians?

No notes. They are dominating is the dating field. Showing up in friendships. And the WNBA is the only reason I’ll ever be interested in basketball games.

Whats your process for writing a joke?

Let embarrassing things happen to me and then share it with the class without shame. That’s the process.

What’s exciting you right now?

I love TikTok videos about this baby donkey named Jasper. A new set of teeth grew in last month, very exciting. His bowl cut went away, did you know baby donkeys are born with a bowl cut?? It’s like is SuperCuts in the womb???

Favorite thing to cook?

I don’t cook, but if I have to… scrambled eggs and bacon. Real basic, safe, and who doesn’t like eggs and bacon in the morning?

One Hour Photo Creative Prodcution: Carly Kane

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A bottle-girl level story that still makes her sweat.